The Gift of Life
A Woman is Given the Choice to Live
By LK
I was given only a few days to live.
Although three doctors tried to help me, my liver had failed. Now I was too weak to move. I had a very high fever, and my hands and feet had started to go numb. Eventually, the doctors seemed to give up and left the hospital room.
But one of the doctors returned. She told me if I had a very strong desire to live, I might still survive. If I was willing to fight for my life, the doctor promised she would do everything in her power to help me.
"The decision is yours," she said. "I'll leave you alone to think about it for the next hour."
The last thing I wanted was to be left alone with my thoughts.
My life had fallen apart. I had broken up with my fiancé, and my illness cost me my job. I had hit rock bottom and was just too tired to live.
As I wondered what to do, Wah Z, the inner side of Sri Harold Klemp, the Mahanta, the Living ECK Master, appeared in the room.
He asked, "How's it going?"
"Everything's falling apart!" I said.
He smiled gently and replied, "Everything's falling into place. This is a piece of cake for you."
I looked back at him in amazement. This didn't feel like a piece of cake to me. I wasn't sure I could fight hard enough to make it.
When the doctor returned to the room, I told her I was afraid I didn't have enough strength to pull through.
She smiled and said, "That's the right answer. If you're worried about whether you'll make it or not, then you have the will to live. My bet's on you."
For the next three nights, the Inner Master came to me in my dreams. The first night, Wah Z took me to a dark void. I knew if I crossed it, I would not be able to come back to my body.
"The choice is yours," he said.
I thought of my family and how much it would hurt them if I left this way. Immediately, I sank back into my body.
The next night, we visited an enormous oak tree. A single leaf was the size of a metropolitan city. Together, we traveled down to the massive roots.
"Watch how the challenges of life enliven the tree," said Wah Z, as an exquisite energy came through his fingers and flowed up the roots and into the tree.
I watched how the energy made the tree grow and become more beautiful. "See," he said, "There is nothing to fear."
On the third night, Wah Z took me to a way station for Souls who had tossed the gift of their lives away. All of them regretted it and now realized life was worth living. I remembered a recent lifetime where I'd lost the will to live.
Then I saw the ECK Master Gopal Das walking down an open corridor. He smiled at me with tremendous love and understanding. An image of the Temple of ECK in Chanhassen appeared, reminding me of all the blessings it would bring to the world.
"It would be a shame to miss this lifetime," he said, with a twinkle in his eye.
Suddenly, the word liver appeared in my inner vision. With his finger, Wah Z covered the r in the word liver.
He looked straight into my eyes and whispered, "Live."
When I woke that morning, I'd noticed I felt happy. There was love in my heart, and the world seemed broader, wider, like it was a vast sunlit field with new life growing in it. There was so much yet to explore.
I wanted to live.
The Inner Master had given me a precious gift. He opened my heart to love and helped me see the sacredness of life. Now I knew how much I was loved.
Slowly, my body began to heal, although it would take many years before I fully regained my health.
Through it all, I received the constant guidance and help of my remarkable friend Wah Z. With his help and love, I now truly understand the wonder and beauty of being alive. His beautiful presence lights my heart to this day, reminding me in every moment that life really is worth living.
Excerpted from the 2008 Eckankar Journal, copyright © 2007 ECKANKAR. All rights reserved. Illustration by Jeff Hukill.
